HOME : FINALLY.

On July 18, 2015, after three months in total hospital care, my husband was declared free from infection a result from a complication of stroke, we were finally sent home with a staggering hospital bill, a room in a house converted to a complete hospital setting, 4 staff nurses to care for him (Two shifts on a 12 hour basis) round the clock monitoring ... he is finally home.

At home, it doesn't come easy. I was paranoid. In Davao, I do research medically just to keep my paranoia at bay sleeping at 2am for a grueling 51 days. Here, old habits die hard. It pays off when u know what Doctors are talking about, or you have a rouge nurse - it's my safety net to detect anything unusual. My unsolicited advice to those who are managing a critical care patient, make a medical diary. It does not need to be filled with medical terms (but it sure comes handy), vitals, fluids, medications anything about the patient you should know. It's empirically of the outmost importance !

Moving on, my husband went home via ambulance, with tracheostomy, PEG and ileostomy during the coming weeks, physical rehabilitation and occupational therapist (which includes working on his swallowing) visits three times a week to teach him everything. Standing via tilt table, eating, bladder training, like a baby on their first glimpse of the world my husband, the love of my life did all that. LEARNING again... his mind was somewhere else like a child, unaware, no voice but feelings ? I felt him everyday holding my hand, hugging and kissing my cheek, I knew he was there inside somewhere unable to express himself. I hold back my tears, I hold back my frustration, everything when I face him, I had to compose myself. Suppressing how you feel at that moment is very hard but I have to be every ounce brave enough to see everything he has to go thru - together.

Our check up was not an ordinary one, we are taken via ambulance ( it made me shed tears each time ) once a month and all our Physicians would be there - every one of them that is essential for a follow-up care are there. Consultants of St. Lukes Medical Center QC they are never late. I owe everyone our gratitude. Dr. Joven Cuanang, Dr. Menandro Siozon, Dr. Manuel Mariano during our monthly emergency isolation room check-up. After only an hour we are loaded back to the ambulance to head home...

STROKE : AFTERMATH

My sincere apologies for not updating this blog. Anyway's, fast forward after booking a flight from Davao going home to Manila, it was the wisest decision of our lives. Philippine Airlines staff from Davao and Manila • well ( whom my husband and I are beyond grateful for all the caring we received from them ) and Manila helped us secure a ticket, St. Luke's Medical Center QC sent an ambulance to have us transported from the airport of Manila all the way to their hospital. We are thanking u guys from the bottom of our hearts.

I'm going to tell you that in Davao my husband had post-craniotomy, placing of ventricular peritoneal shunting due to hydrocephalus • a stroke side effect, while on and off suffering from a series of infection brought by tracheostomy via mechanical ventilator which delay our goal to go home. Plus a series of not-so-nice Doctors that I had to fire for purposely delaying our stay in Davao resulting to more set backs which St. Luke's Medical Center in QC found out three days after our confinement at their hospital... will go thru that later on.

Yes, my husband neurologically speaking survived all that however, complications arise - on the 3rd day upon confinement here in Manila he developed a fever. Fever is a red flag on a critical care, it is a sign of infection. An infection of the V/P shunting from the abdomen all the way to the brain. Streptococcus Faecalis one deadly form of bacteria from fecal matter, caused a part of his intestines to rot, appendix rupture and Cerebro Spinal Fluids to go grainy with bacteria. It was a fight for his life. V/P shunting had to be removed, his brain needs to be washed (lavage), an ommaya reservoir was placed and ileostomy had to be done. Almost two months in the Neuro Critical Care Unit...his quality of life is uncertain.

My physician since I was a kid, Doctor Joven Cuanang headed one team of Doctors to care for my husband. He headed everything and told me, "Brain cancer nga lumalaban tayu on a 60 year old, he is so young dito pa kaya ?". However, this is a very long and expensive treatment. He wasn't wrong.

We are only 40 years old, this is not happening... it can't. Right ? I was wrong, we were wrong.  I cannot even begin to imagine how I stand up at that moment when right in my very eyes I'm watching my husband fight for his very life and to even begin to write all these that's why it took me long. Gathering up the courage to recall everything that went on, no matter how I would like to share  it's to painful to remember.

( In the photo : Thanks to my two nurses and one Doctor on board PAL flight DVO-MNL, Thank you PAL and staff, Thank you St. Luke's Medical Center and Dra. Bernadette Manalo-Arcena )

STROKE : A MEDICAL EMERGENCY

My life was fine before all this... at least the ones I am aware of - not the cover ups which I will soon reveal on my next succeeding posts.

I am 38 years old at the time when shit happened in my life ( not that this is the first time shiteous things happen to ehem ... good people ),  my husband of 15 years suffered a massive stroke. We have two kids by the way.



Going back, to the day of a stroke... it was 6 days after we arrived from our vacation I got a call from my eldest Brother in-law that my husband had a stroke. I knew it was bad ... I just sensed it. I haven't had my bath yet - I was resting after cooking lunch, kids are downstairs at my In-Laws. I panicked, my BIL told me to get ready to leave for Davao City. Immediately, I called my eldest 11 year old daughter to help me pack my things. I froze for a moment, head to the shower and while the warm water pours from my head down to my face I was crying ... endlessly. Having to think how to get from Quezon City to Davao City in a jiffy was a nightmare. I knew I had to get there. Still dripping wet and crying I put on my clothes and my daughter went asking " Why are you crying Mom ? I said. " It's about your Dad, something happened to him. " She replied tears flowing from her eyes " Mom, I know its bad right ? " I nod and replied. " Don't worry baby, things will be alright. " Your Dad will be fine. " In my mind,  we are facing the uncertainty but I silently vowed to my daughter that I will do my very best to make things better. I hugged her goodbye and went down. While hurrying going to the car with my 2nd Brother in-Law I never got to say goodbye to my youngest. I couldn't take my kids with me, I just had to see their Dad.

In the car, I called my best-friend to book a flight for BIL and me. I told her what happened. My mind was numb, aware that I will be facing a scenario that I am not ready to encounter. After a few minutes she called back and got us a flight. By 8PM we were in Davao.

During the span of waiting at the airport having to talk to my Husband's physician to approved to open his skull, in medical terms - craniotomy, thru phone and assuring her that I am on a flight to Davao City was an ordeal. You see, an operation cannot be done without an immediate family member's signature consent. Finally she agreed we were running out of time.

I was told there is a 75cc bleed on his brain, it is massive. Performing a craniotomy for a force evacuation of hematoma to the brain will not guarantee his survival or way of life. It was a gamble for his life and we did...

By 8:30PM my husband was taken to the OR, I barely missed him. He was already in a COMA.


to be continued...